Wait a Minute... That Wedding Tradition Came From WHERE?!
When it comes to wedding planning, you're going to notice certain someones will start suggesting you do certain things a certain way. People are going to want to lend you their opinion and Pinterest is going to pull you towards current trends. There's nothing wrong with that... UNTIL you start losing yourself in the overwhelming flood of it all.
Weddings don't have to be done a specific
way to be beautiful + memorable + meaningful.
There are many wedding traditions we uphold to this day simply because... well, because... that's just how weddings are done??
Don't just do something because it's traditional.
Did you know the tradition of brides carrying bouquets down the aisle on their wedding day began because back in the day, people hardly bathed?! Yep, those flowers were to cover up the bride's stank. The tradition of not seeing each other until walking down the aisle originated during a time when marriages were arranged. The bride and groom were kept from seeing each other until then so they wouldn't run away in case they didn't find each other attractive or suitable for marriage. When you peel back the years, some traditions may not quite have the appeal you thought they did.
Do things because they have meaning to you as a couple.
I challenge you to make a list of typical wedding practices and sit down with your fiancé to talk about which of those things are important to you, which of them you want to tweak to make you own and which of them you want to do away with entirely. You can also make a list of things that aren't typically done at weddings that you'd like to incorporate on your wedding day. Be willing to stand up for these ideas because people may push back. There were some aspects of our wedding we fought for (and I'm so incredibly glad we did) and some things we decided to let go. You may find yourself in those situations, but I'm telling you, you'll never regret being true to yourselves.
Let me help you get the wheels turning by sharing some things we did at our own wedding as well as things I've seen at other weddings.
At our wedding:
We only invited family and close friends to the ceremony and had a larger guest list for the reception
We sent out digital save the dates instead of printing them as cards or magnets
Our ceremony was along an outdoor walking trail and our guests sat on tree stumps and benches (our aisle was the trail)
We didn't have a ring bearer or flower girls
Our parents and grandparents didn't have boutonnieres and corsages - instead we gave our mothers and grandmothers single stemmed flowers
We washed each others' feet instead of having a unity candle
We rented GoPros to let guests get candid footage throughout the day
We used cakes as centerpieces at our reception in a variety of flavors so guests would have to mingle to try different cakes (I totally stole that idea from a friend of mine!)
We didn't have wedding favors
We didn't do a bouquet or garter toss
Oh, and we did NOT save any of the cake to freeze and eat one year later, so I can't report on how good or bad that tastes
Our wedding photos are by Kinsey Mhire
At weddings I've been to and photographed, I've seen:
People get married at night under the stars
Two day weddings (Ceremony one day, reception the next)
Couples serve their guests dinner instead of eating first
Church ladies prepare a pot luck style meal
Cheesecake, donuts, pie or other desserts served in place of cake
Instead of a dollar dance, a couple bartended for tips
Amigo's get served at the reception at the end of the night
Moral of the story:
You're free to create new traditions and do things that are completely and totally you.
Just because something is traditional doesn't mean you have to do it, and just because it's unheard of doesn't mean you can't.